Library Queen

Of course we have had the most beautiful, unseasonably wonderful sunny weather for two weekends in a row. Where have I been if I wasn't at work? You guessed it, the Library. Trying my very best to pass my Chemistry class with a B. Of course, you have to know that the view from the library is amazing if you are lucky enough to get the right seat.

You can see the marina, the Lincoln docked near the Navy base, Mukilteo, the ferry crossing back and forth, Whidbey Island, and the Olympic Mountains. On a clear day it is truly amazing. But really, I find that when I'm at the library I rarely look up. It is one of the few places I can truly concentrate. I can focus and get reading, homework, and much more done than if I attempted to do it at home. It is a solace and help to me now that I've gone back to school.

It even boasts an amazing coffee bar, and the girls already know me! It is delicious, and you can actually take your drinks to the study tables as long as they are lidded. Yeah, Seattle!

I have two weeks of class and exams left and then a summer to enjoy while my brain re-grows the cobwebs!

TGIF

Finally, a drama free Friday. I am celebrating with my girl, my favorite beer, and the Mariners actually managed to beat the LA Angels. Whoot!

Sandra Is Right

My friend Sandy says with the ease of hair dyes these days, we should never go grey. I have to admit, I've toyed with the idea. Why not, sometimes I feel like I've earned every single one of them and feel a bit of pride about them - but then I saw this picture.

Holy cow, can you even believe this is the same woman? Do you see that smile? I believe I need to tell her she is correct, we do not need to go grey after all.

Here I was thinking now that I'm in the Pacific Northwest where grey is a common site on many women what's the big deal? OMG!!! Obviously, it is a big deal - I guess my hairdresser will continue to love me for many, many, many, years to come!

(I haven't quite figured out how this goes along with just being happy with who you are or self acceptance but I certainly know I feel better when my hair looks good!)

I think I Need This Shirt for Work...

This tells you how it's going. Just when I thought everything was good. Ha.

Pitch Woman (addendum attached as of 5/28/09

I've never pitched a show to a network. I know people who know people who have, and well, I probably do know people who have. But, I have not. I was thinking, TLC may need a replacement program for Jon and Kate Plus Eight now that it appears the couple is in the midst of very troubled times.

Now keep in mind, we all loved when the sextuplets were babies, and yes now that they are 5 they are still cute but...imagine if we could put them with another set of babies. Babies that could use some older siblings to hug on them and love them up. Team a mom who has training with multiples, who used to be a licensed nurse, and knows how to organize just about anything up with another mom. Have you figured out who I am referring to yet?

Here it comes...(drum roll please)

It's Two Single Mom's Plus 20! Why let the Duggar's have all the fun with the huge number of multiple children? Let Kate and Nadya Suleman move into together and let the good times roll. We already know Kate's personality type. Organized, effective, controlling, okay - make that very controlling. She appears to be good with her kids. She keeps them well fed, clean, and the house is in amazing order for having 8 eight children. Now, flip to Nadya, The little we truly know of her she comes off, as well, a bit flighty. Not too reality based, if you will. How does she truly believe just she and her mother could raise all those children? But team her up with Kate, and look out. The Suleman children will have clean rooms, a clean house, why maybe even a bed with a frame on it and sheets. The older children may possibly get the developmental help they need as well as the preemies. Just think, matching outfits for the twenty of them (gagging).

Think of the episode possibilities. Why, just bath time could fill one entire hour. The pre-bath (catching them all) and getting them undressed and in the tub. The bath itself - soap in the eyes, bubbles everywhere, and how many in the tub at once? The post bath, dressing them all in pj's and getting them into bed. Oh the insanity of it all...as if either of these mom's is doing this all by themselves anyhow.

Yes, TLC can save the state of California tons of money in financial support. It's also a way to keep Kate on the air (since she claims she looks at this as her "job" now, to financially support her tribe). For all the rubber neckers who can't help but watch the lives of these families unfold (implode?) a form of support without buying the National Enquirer at the check out stand.

And if all else fails, maybe Angelina and Brad could adopt them all...just saying.

I started thinking about these two families and realized I made a mathematical error - Kate has 8, Nadya 14...so it would be 2 Single Mom's Plus 22! Oops!

I'm Hooked On This Program,

Breaking Bad. It's funny, I'm not even sure what channel it's on, but I do record it every week and enjoy watching it. It's harsh, it's funny, it is so very human. Of course, since I'm taking Chemistry and the title layouts and credits all feature the chemical formulas found in the periodic table - it's funny to see how many I can name. Those would have met little to me 2 months ago, but now I'm kinda liking this new found information. But back to the program. Dad of one handicapped teenage son, married to a very pregnant woman. He is diagnosed with cancer and the future does not look good. He teaches chemistry. He makes a huge life decision - based on the fact he may soon loose his and leave his family financially fraught. He hooks up with a young hoodlum and together they formulate a new "species" of meth. It's blue, it's lethal, it's a hit. I love that there is no canned laughter, no spoofy acting, just a very good (and dark) story that has managed to grab my attention when very little on TV does these days.

Too Tired to Blog

Had two very yummy Mai Tai's with plenty of coconut rum at Terra Cotta Red tonight during happy hour. Now I'm not only happy but very tired. Not only is Chemistry kicking my behind, but so is it's early call in the morning. I'm just not good at getting up at 6:15am and having to be human the rest of the day.

Have several blogs rolling around in my head...but as of today, they will stay in rolling status and hopefully find their way onto the screen soon. I have decided I just need to put pj's on and relax. It's Thursday night before a 3 day weekend, find a way to enjoy yourself.

Words to Live By

I have faith, the universe has always taken care of me. I do believe in God, in some way, form, or entinty. But honestly, if there was a church of Jamie, this alone would be my creed. When it all comes down to it I think this is why we are here. To help one another, to love one another, to teach one another, and grow. It seems so simple to me.

Lost *Anonymosity

In November of 2006, I arrived in Washington and I only knew two people besides my ex. Slowly, gradually, as I began working, going to Curves, taking the dogs for a walk, I began to meet people.

This was not like my home in Costa Mesa, where everywhere I went I ran into people I knew. Anonymity was a non-existent state of being. I had lived and worked there for 15 years. I had taken classes, taught classes, attended meetings, I had a favorite coffee shop. My hair stylist, my doctor, my chiropractor, and mechanic were all within 5 minutes of my home. It was there I cultivated my massage clients and lived my life.

Fast forward to winter, spring, and really most of 2007 and 2008. I knew very few people. Very few people knew me. When heading out to Trader Joe's, I never ran into people I knew. It was almost similar to being on vacation - where you can assume a goofy identity at the bar if you so choose just to mess with strangers. Now, I didn't do that, but I kind of grew to enjoy my new found state of feeling like a tourist.

Back home, I was so tired of living in a relationship that was harmful to me, yet trying to make it appear to be okay. I dreaded anyone asking me about it. Or even asking me how I was, because isn't our "state" inevitably tied to our heart? I was tired of the people who knew I had been doing massage therapy for ten years asking me I needed to "practice" (give them a freebie). Let me say, this was usually the same handful of idiots again and again. Or the ones that ask when you are going to have a baby (hello, read-over 40, infertile and married to cheap, selfish person) or adopt. You know those endless questions, waaaay personal, but still those you see at aerobics every week always ask.

So, back to me enjoying my new anonymous state, I did. I really did! But, now I have a life. I've built a new one. One that I quite enjoy and am proud of my new found happiness. Don't mind those menacing questions as much as I did prior. In fact, the funny thing is, because the quality of my daily life is so good, other than to tell you just that, I don't have much to report. I'm happy, we're happy, school is hard, and work is fun but work. My children are all furry and feathered ones that I adore. I get lonely for my family and friends in California, but that's all I miss.

Now onto how I know I've lost my anonymous state. In my Chemistry class is Carla. We got to talking, and I found out she used to be employed by my current employer. The woman I work with is one of her best friends. Go figure! Then, she comes into class today and tells me I even know her mom. Okay, I'll admit I can't imagine who her mom is because really I have a new circle of friends, but it's not all that large. Sure enough, I do! Her mother was at the New Year's Eve party we attended in 2007. She is a co-worker of a friend of ours and well known to my other half. She told her daughter she was going to attend our "wedding" this summer. Of course her daughter made a big fuss, "Oh, you are getting married!? I didn't know that!" So, I kindly filled her in on our plans. Inside, I was laughing loudly because sure enough, people know me here. My *anonymosity here in Washington is nevermore. I'm okay with that.

*Anonymosity-a new word by Jamie! the state of being or functioning as an unknown entity to those around you.

When Will I Learn?

I am guilty of opening my mouth and inserting foot, again. Of course, I realized it eventually but not soon enough - as in before hand. Damn. I just feel so dumb, because I know better! I got caught, while being extremely busy at work "thinking aloud." Inserting foot into mouth syndrome happens to increase for me proportionately when I am a bit flustered or frustrated. For reasons of wanting to remain employed, let's just say I was running yesterday and people are just not very patient these days.

I have cut back at work on the "chatter," when busy - now I try to just smile and say hello...not ask people how they are. (Is it just me, or does that sound somehow not exactly right, either?) But now, obviously I need to work on the inner chatter - and remember to keep it that way!

Forgive me, those who overheard me. I'm sure, once again, I've left them wondering just how my brain works - or doesn't!

Less Time Away From Home....Please

My schedule has kept me on the run lately. I've spent quite a bit of time away from home. The library, the tutoring center, class, work, errands, and a very small social life have meant that the kitties are not getting the amount of attention they are used to having. The minute my back pack is open, especially when there is room in it - well, Jack is inside of it. Sometimes to just hang out and nap. Sometimes she likes to hide and jump out an attack Toupe. All I know is that she thinks it is another spot that is hers, by proxy of being mine. She is the cat we call our dog-cat. I feel bad that I have spent so much time away, but hopefully tolerating those 3:00 a.m. cuddles and nuzzles I allow make up for it.

15 Minutes (Nadya Suleman, Where Have You Gone?)

Now, I will admit I don't watch a lot of TV. Just don't have the time right now. But, what has happened to the women with 14 children? Have not heard about her, have not seen her...not even on a tabloid cover as I stand in line at the grocery store.

Has her 15 minutes expired, or are they giving her a TV show after all? I heard from someone that Gloria Allred was suing her on behalf of the infants. Evidently so she would not be able to profit from any money made from them, and it would have to be set up in a trust. Hmmmmm. I'm wondering, if she is wondering how she will clothe and feed them all yet. Has any reality of the situation sunk in for her as of yet?

I still say let her lovely, intelligent infertility doctor pay child support. He did after all impregnate her, no?

One Of My Favorite Pics, Well Maybe Two

It is still our anniversary, after all and I am stuck doing homework and studying for another exam. I was feeling like April rarely gets her cute face here...so here it is. 730 days together and she is still smiling. Lucky me.

Two Years In A Forever Kind Of Love

This is what happy together looks like. It's what we are, usually, generally, and most days. It is pretty easy between us, and has been from the start. We seem to bring out the very best in one another. I finally have a partner I like, I love, I lust for, and am so lucky. Blessed, if you will. We both know we are, and we are oh so grateful.

I have many pictures that look just like this one of the two of us. Both of us with goofy, big smiles, silly happy, and just enjoying just being together. For the first time in my life I want to live longer, just so I can have the company of this incredible woman.

She gets me. She laughs at my amazingly bad dancing. She encourages me. She listens to me bitch about the hum drum of daily life, without complaining. She loves my body, just way it is. Okay, so she does like me blonde, but who in my life so far hasn't voted for that color as best of all? She only snores occasionally. She is easy to sleep with and just the right amount of cuddly. She changed out the dead head light in my car. She put my tabs on my car plate for me. In general, she is my laundress. And, keeps me in clean work clothes and fresh sox's. She cleans up any crazy cooking demolition I create in the kitchen without complaint. She tells me she loves me more than any other person on the planet. She looks at me in such a way, I know it's true. When she kisses me, well....I'll just say it's still just like the first time, lucky me. I love her red hair and fiery temper that sometimes accompanies it. I find her amazingly beautiful, she looks great without any hint of make-up. Lucky her.

She's sensitive. She's sweet and thoughtful. Her heart is kind. She is social. She likes to have friends over and just hang out and laugh. She loves her computer. Loves to read. She loves animals. She is a joy to come home to, and hard for me to leave behind when I head out into the world.


I'm still smitten, can you tell? And on the eve of our two year anniversary, I'll just say I'm thankful for this amazing woman who fills my life, my home, and my heart.

Ms. Penny Wenny, With Love From Jamie Wamie

This is my mom. Her name is Penny. Tomorrow is Mother's Day and of course, being a good and supportive mom, she reads my blog. So mom, this one's for you! For all that you've done, for all that you do, for the love you given me that reaches beyond the distance. You taught me to trust myself and be strong. You taught me to speak up for myself. You taught me compassion and kindness. You let me laugh and play. You offered up all your creative talents to keep me entertained and happy when I was a kid.

Life has not always be easy (is it ever?) and we have come through some pretty big hurdles to still find our way back to one another as mother and daughter. For your continued trying I am grateful. I know that even when we disagree, we still love one another and that is a lesson for all of us to learn.

I think you sacrificed a great deal for us (Jeff and I) as kids and I appreciate that. Somehow, I think you may have often dreamt of a horse ranch far removed from city life and Dad. But you stayed, and provided us with the best you could. Thanks for that mom.

Jamie's Top Ten for Mom's Best Evers

10. Baked Alaskan for my birthday - you made it and it was an awesome feat! 9. All the theme birthday parities you threw for me! Remember the Panda Cake? Ferrels Ice Cream Parlor - with so many kids in the car we got a flat tire in the drive way! Dad never knew! 8. Letting Jeff and I play in the back yard with the water wiggle even thought it meant every window on our house and neighbors would get wet. 7. Getting me Raggs for my 6th birthday. He was the best dog for 17 years. 6. Teaching me how to coordinate fabric, notions, and pick out patterns. But you sewed, woot! 5. Doing my hair for me. Especially the little bun that made me feel so grown up, or those lovely stinky home perms that smelled so wonderful! Ha. 4. Teaching me how to drive a stick shift in one, yes, one night, in Grandma's mini orange Honda. 3. Teaching me the value of family. Holidays, beach, birthdays, Cousin Parties, weddings, etc... 2. Taking care of yourself and making us eat salad every night at dinner, no matter what! I still crave greens!

1. Just being you, with all your love for me. That love I have never doubted.

(Oh, and mostly being a good sport through out the years!)

Happy Mother's Day, Mom

A Funny Little Happy Saturday Song - Contains a foul word and undisturbing images! Ha!

Found this fun, happy video for all the haters out there. This is especially for all the men that look over and see me holding Suzi's (aka April) hand while we are driving and have something to say about it. Or at least give us the "death ray" look! Yes, she's better for me than you!

Thanks to Pimp My Wry's blog and Lily Allen's music.

Before you read the lyrics I've posted here, you have to promise me you will listen to the video. Reason being, the video is such a happy tune, not at all what you will imagine would go with the lyrics.

Here ya go;

Look inside, look inside your tiny mind
and look a bit harder
Cause we’re so uninspired
so sick and tired
of all the hatred you harbor

So you say it’s not okay to be gay
well I think you’re just evil
You’re just some racist who can’t tie my laces
you’re point of view is medieval

Fuck you, fuck you very very much
cause we hate what you do
and we hate your whole crew
so please don’t stay in touch

Fuck you, fuck you very very much
cause your words don’t translate
and it’s getting quite late
so please don’t stay in touch

Do you get, do you get a little kick out of being small-minded?
you want to be like your father
it’s approval you’re after
well that’s not how you’ll find it

Do you, do you really enjoy living a life that’s so hateful?
cause there’s a hole where your soul should be
you’re losing control of it
and it’s really distasteful

Fuck you, fuck you very very much
cause we hate what you do
and we hate your whole crew
so please don’t stay in touch

Fuck you, fuck you very very much
cause your words don’t translate
and it’s getting quite late
so please don’t stay in touch

Look inside, look inside your tiny mind
and look a bit harder
Cause we’re so uninspired
so sick and tired
of all the hatred you harbor

Fuck you, fuck you very very much
cause we hate what you do
and we hate your whole crew
so please don’t stay in touch

Fuck you, fuck you very very much
cause your words don’t translate
and it’s getting quite late
so please don’t stay in touch

I Want, I Want

to live in the middle of a 5 acre farm, where the closest thing I can hear is my own animals going crazy. Where my neighbors can be idiots, and other than driving by their houses and seeing it, I'd never know. Where I can run about naked, with all the blinds up, windows open and no one would care - save the ranch hands. I just feel the need for space and lots and lots of it these days.