Things That Stick

For what it's worth: it's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be.

There's no time limit, stop whenever you want.

You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing.

We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it.

And I hope you see things that startle you.

I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view.

I hope you live a life you're proud of.

If you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.

This quote is from the end of Benjamin Button. I came home from work and April was watching the film. I remember enjoying it the first time through and sat down to enjoy the last hour of it again. It is such a different way to live life, going from very old to new born. If you have not watched it, that will make no sense at all. I highly suggest take a quiet evening and treat your self to a tale. I love movies with narration and good story telling and this has them both.

I am so thankful that at 49 years old, I can still feel this way (most days!). It reminds me to disregard the naysayers. The people who shake their heads, who tease me, who just don't understand. There are still so many things I want to do, be, accomplish and be astounded by.

Officially Older Than...

I care to admit!!! Age is a strange thing. I really never gave it much thought until I actually stopped passing for much younger than I am. That began to happen along side of being in a bad marriage. Funny how stress can effect us in ways we never thought of.

Then there is the sun. I grew up, sun kissed. Sometimes, often times, sun burnt. My little nose burnt and peeling more times than I could possibly recall. I am blessed with a smattering of freckles to prove it. As I've gotten older the residual of sun rays has transformed from freckles to moles and in some cases barnacles! (I swear that's what they look and feel like!)

There are the physical effects of aging, and other than my skin changing I really can't complain too much. I long for knees that don't creak when I walk upstairs but at least they still work and don't hurt. I am still hopeful that someday soon my period will forever cease, won't that be wonderful! An up side to getting older!

And speaking of the upside, there is the obvious I'm still here. Alive. A chance, a million, zillion little chances everyday to live. To do it well. Make a difference. Make someone smile. Make myself smile. Participate. Create. Love. Be. Isn't that what it really comes down to?

The number of years is only a bi product of getting to be in this fabulous universe just one more day. Today I think I'll take the trade.

Birthday Goobers

We celebrated April's 41st birthday yesterday...we headed out to Archie Mcphee yesterday for some laughs and shopping. You know for those very necessary things like Jesus band aids, squirrel underpants, and April's very own toy paparazzi collection. They are mobbing her as I type on her PC. Very funny. Of course, we had to try out the photo booth, Elvis sunglasses and fake cigarette in tow. Whadya' think?

My other Favorite Blog

The first blog I look at each day is http://elemenop123.blogspot.com/. I just love it. There always words of inspiration and art. Lots and lots and lots of art. Every kind of art you can imagine and some you can't. Like this sculpture made out of books, awesome.

Or funky house sculpture...

Or amazing oil paintings...

Or pictures made from maps, like this one...

Or globes, that make me want to buy them!

Or photographs that inspire me to travel...

This blog is so loved by me because not only is there art that is traditional, there is quirky, unusual, and pieces made of things one would never think could be used as a medium. This blogger is so good that she posts the names of the artist along with their web sites. A great place to go and explore.

On top of all this visual wonderfulness there is a daily quote posted. Words to live by, many of which I've re-posted here because I love them so. I am a die hard for words and art.

Pen is Mightier and Can be More Painful than the Sword.

I don't know about you, but I am aware of who reads my blog. That being said, is one reason I have been so silent here. While I want to mull over my thoughts in writing, look for feed back from familiar souls, I am unable to for fear it will cause harm. I don't want to hurt the feelings of those I love. Maybe time for an anonymous blog where I can fearlessly say what I think? Maybe so.

I wonder how those who write for a living deal with this issue. They say to write what you know, and in this case I would be writing about situations that are known to me and how the make me feel. Truly, in this case reality is more surprising than fiction. The funny thing it is not one only one situation, but many. The topics deal with social behaviors, addictions, child rearing, marriage, divorce, infidelity, family relationships, self esteem, sanity or lack there of, and aging. Most of which I know about first hand and in close observation. What to do, what to do. What would you do? Do you think there are spiritual ramifications when you spill your heart out all over paper?

The Blog-Less Wonder

For those of you who still bother to check in here and see if I am alive, I am.

It's not that I haven't wanted to write, but that the days seem to be fuller lately and by the time I think of sitting down to blog well the ideas have vanished. Brain dead. I also have been reading quite a bit, which is a nice change of scenery for me. I am loving this book, the Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet.

School update for today, two classes left and I am applying for Nursing School for this Fall/Winter. Get completely anxious every time I think about it but going to plunge ahead and go for it. Not in class this quarter due to a error on behalf of the communication or lack there of between nursing records office and college admissions office. By the time I caught the prereq debacle, all classes I could possibly take were full. Besides the fact that an inner office envelope and approval take days to happen, apparently.

This has been a good and bad thing. Good because I am working and not having to study. Bad because truly, it is really nice having a life. Hanging out with April, being social, actually doing things, not having to be in the library every weekend, seeing friends these are all activities I miss when in class. I don't want to get too used to it. It will have to come to an end again, sigh.

Planning on death carrying out death to cable when we return from Phoenix on the 9th, then I will have plenty of time to blather, I mean blog!

Wrapped Up in the Quiet

of the morning is a wonderful way to start the day. It gives my mind time to just wander and think about the week. The month. The year. To think about the holiday and just how lucky we are in this small household of five and a half. (Yes, Pidge only gets a half count since he weighs under 10 ounces.)

This morning it feels as if the silence has swirled around me like a blanket. Keeping me comfy and warm, safe and content. Letting me in on the secrets my heart holds. Do more art, my unconscious whispers. Your body wants exercise (your mind as well), in the silence my mind can acknowledge this request. In the silence it is possible to hear these simple needs arise to the surface, not merely feel them as a distant rumbling. In the silence I feel the courage to move on and find employment that will serve me. I can feel the courage. I can feel the truth, that I am worth hiring. Who wouldn't want me on their team?

The silence in our home is sprinkled with play. Toupee is running in circles upstairs (how can a 8 pound cat sound like a wild heard of elephants all by himself?) trying to get Jack's attention to chase him. He is most always successful and the game of tag begins. The run, they tackle, they escape from one another and begin again. Pidge is serenading himself in the large mirror, loudly. He woof whistles at himself and then begins to sing. He is so in love, with his own image. Of course this song is interrupted by occasionally landing on my head to talk to me. The silence not quite so sound, but they are happy sounds that disrupt and I am thankful for them.

The comfort of the silence this morning makes offering up the cable box back to Comcast soon so much easier.